Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us.

I'm sorry I've neglected this blog since I started Fat Gal Fitness. This blog was more about my personal life and since my personal life has sort of turned into everything I post on Fat Gal Fitness, it didn't seem necessary to update this one as well. But I figured it was time the ol' blogspot got some love.

As the world knows, October is Breast Cancer Awareness month. And as you know, if you know me or have read this blog, I lost my aunt Marika to breast cancer on December 1, 2011.

Marika was an amazing person. She had the strongest faith of anyone I know, continually praising God in every trial she faced. She was an amazing mother to the three children she left behind, who have grown into unbelievably wonderful adults. Her relationship with my mom is the kind of relationship I strive to have with my brother and sister. No matter what, they were there for one another, always there to make every person around them snort with laughter. They were truly Lucy and Ethel. She was my second mom, loving me and encouraging me in every step I took in life. I am incredibly blessed to have had such a close relationship with her.

Having Marika in my life shaped the person I am today in so many ways, some of which I'm sure I haven't even realized yet. I trust God and praise Him even in my darkest hours because she showed me how. She battled cancer for ten years but I cannot tell you that I ever saw her lose her hope, or the inextinguishable joy she found in her love for Jesus Christ. I work hard at everything I do because of the example she set. When she got too sick to go to work, she started making breast cancer awareness bracelets at home, donating the proceeds to her local cancer center, the very one that helped her. That's just the kind of person Marika was; she was totally, utterly selfless. She brought joy to every person she encountered, regardless of what state she might be in. At one of the doctor's appointments I took her to, she spent her time not questioning why this happened to her, what this all means, but asking the doctor about his children, making sure they were still doing well in school.

Not a single day goes by that I don't miss Marika. I still get totally overwhelmed by the fact that she isn't here anymore. Each year that goes by doesn't make it any easier, knowing I'll see her in Heaven someday doesn't make the fact that I can't see her now hurt any less. I just hope that I can live a life that honors her and everything she did for me. She gave me hope, she gave me an example of what a true woman of God is. She showed me that our circumstances don't define us, and our true character can shine in our darkest days.

This year, for breast cancer awareness month, I plan to do my best to honor the life Marika lived and show my support for every person going through this. I also plan to have a little fun with it, because that's what Marika did. She could be feeling totally ill but that didn't stop her from having a dance party with me in the kitchen. I have been making breast cancer awareness bracelets like the ones Marika used to make. If you are interested in buying one, please let me know. I will also be putting a non permanent pink streak in my hair. We used to tease her that we were going to buy her a hot pink or purple wig to wear. And it will be non permanent because come Springtime, I will be cutting and donating my hair to the Pantene Beautiful Lengths program, which provides wigs to women going through treatment for cancer of any kind. I am also in talks with a friend to participate in a breast cancer walk here in town.

How will you honor those who have been affected by cancer? We have to choose to be proactive; I could let my grief swallow me up or I could live proudly, embracing the time God has given me on this earth. The greatest disservice I could do to Marika's memory is to waste my days wallowing and questioning God's wisdom. Marika always said she wasn't a breast cancer survivor, she was a conqueror. So in her honor, that is what I plan to be.

"Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."